Happy New Years!
So, it’s New Years day and I’m stuck sitting here (at 8am, slightly hung over) trying to come up with something profound that will help you set a great pace for a new year of dating. So, here it goes...
I talk to a lot of people about dating, both virtual and real, and eventually the topic of horror stories always comes up. No matter what the topic, we all love to share horror stories like soldiers in the trenches. It is really a bonding ritual between people (you show me your scars, I’ll show you mine, etc...) And you’d think with being a guy who has done a fair share of dating, I’d have a lot of horror stories to tell... But the truth is...
...I don't have any!
Straight up, it’s true. I have never had a bad date... EVER.
And yes, this includes girls I’ve met through online dating!
Most people I tell that to think that I’m full of it, and you may as well, so let me explain. Have I ever had dates with a girl I met online, where she showed up and was 40lbs heavier than her picture, or 10 years older than she claimed to be, or she just wasn’t as much of a conversationalist as she was in email?
Yes...
But that has nothing to do with having a bad date!
See, when I go on a date, I go with two thoughts:
1) I’m going to have fun, with or without the girl.
2) I have no expectations of any outcome.
Big girl, little girl, old girl, young girl, I don’t care if she’s mislead me in her profile, because I expect NOTHING from her, or the date, more than simply to share some laughs. All I’m doing is showing up to meet a new friend!
Now, I’m not saying I haven’t been a little bit disappointed in some of the dates, but I get over it quickly by just going over in my head that I’m here to have a good time, not to get anything from the girl. If it turns out we have great chemistry, awesome! If we don’t, that’s OK too, because she’s still a person that I can have fun with, make laugh, and walk away from with a smile.
So...
I haven’t told you the best part yet...
This mindset is CRAZY ATTRACTIVE to women! All women!
Think about it... A guy who is fun and has a good time no matter what, combined with the confidence of not seeking to gain anything from her? Women respect and value that, as it is a rare trait among men. When it comes to the girls you really want, be the guy who doesn’t need her, but instead seeks to brighten her day (both your days, actually). While she may or may not ask you back to her place for drinks that night, she will definitely not forget you when you ask her out for a second date!
Once you start bringing that attitude on dates with gorgeous women who you are really interested in, your results will start to skyrocket... and best of all... you’ll never have a bad date again!
So, think about this for a while, let it set it, and picture the advantages it gives you. Start your 2008 with this in your head:
HAVE FUN!
DON'T BE ATTACHED TO AN OUTCOME!
And I pretty much guarantee you’ll have a much better dating season!
Cheers!
Dylan Alexander
PS. The Online Casanova book is finally available for sale! Some website troubles and last minute revisions caused a few delays, but you can now get it through my main website! As a New Years bonus, you can get $10 off using the following code: xk120
http://www.onlinecasanova.com/
Check out the Online Dating Aptitude Quiz, or go right to the Products page at the bottom to buy the book. It's the perfect way to kick off a new year of online dating!
So, it’s New Years day and I’m stuck sitting here (at 8am, slightly hung over) trying to come up with something profound that will help you set a great pace for a new year of dating. So, here it goes...
I talk to a lot of people about dating, both virtual and real, and eventually the topic of horror stories always comes up. No matter what the topic, we all love to share horror stories like soldiers in the trenches. It is really a bonding ritual between people (you show me your scars, I’ll show you mine, etc...) And you’d think with being a guy who has done a fair share of dating, I’d have a lot of horror stories to tell... But the truth is...
...I don't have any!
Straight up, it’s true. I have never had a bad date... EVER.
And yes, this includes girls I’ve met through online dating!
Most people I tell that to think that I’m full of it, and you may as well, so let me explain. Have I ever had dates with a girl I met online, where she showed up and was 40lbs heavier than her picture, or 10 years older than she claimed to be, or she just wasn’t as much of a conversationalist as she was in email?
Yes...
But that has nothing to do with having a bad date!
See, when I go on a date, I go with two thoughts:
1) I’m going to have fun, with or without the girl.
2) I have no expectations of any outcome.
Big girl, little girl, old girl, young girl, I don’t care if she’s mislead me in her profile, because I expect NOTHING from her, or the date, more than simply to share some laughs. All I’m doing is showing up to meet a new friend!
Now, I’m not saying I haven’t been a little bit disappointed in some of the dates, but I get over it quickly by just going over in my head that I’m here to have a good time, not to get anything from the girl. If it turns out we have great chemistry, awesome! If we don’t, that’s OK too, because she’s still a person that I can have fun with, make laugh, and walk away from with a smile.
So...
I haven’t told you the best part yet...
This mindset is CRAZY ATTRACTIVE to women! All women!
Think about it... A guy who is fun and has a good time no matter what, combined with the confidence of not seeking to gain anything from her? Women respect and value that, as it is a rare trait among men. When it comes to the girls you really want, be the guy who doesn’t need her, but instead seeks to brighten her day (both your days, actually). While she may or may not ask you back to her place for drinks that night, she will definitely not forget you when you ask her out for a second date!
Once you start bringing that attitude on dates with gorgeous women who you are really interested in, your results will start to skyrocket... and best of all... you’ll never have a bad date again!
So, think about this for a while, let it set it, and picture the advantages it gives you. Start your 2008 with this in your head:
HAVE FUN!
DON'T BE ATTACHED TO AN OUTCOME!
And I pretty much guarantee you’ll have a much better dating season!
Cheers!
Dylan Alexander
PS. The Online Casanova book is finally available for sale! Some website troubles and last minute revisions caused a few delays, but you can now get it through my main website! As a New Years bonus, you can get $10 off using the following code: xk120
http://www.onlinecasanova.com/
Check out the Online Dating Aptitude Quiz, or go right to the Products page at the bottom to buy the book. It's the perfect way to kick off a new year of online dating!
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